Fred Goes to a School Dance is the 45th episode of the Classic FRED YouTube series, uploaded onto the Fred YouTube channel on February 4, 2010.
Fred attends his school's Annual Valentine's Day dance in hopes of fast dancing with Judy.
(Fred comes out of the closet and wears khakis)
Fred: Oh, my gosh, these pants fit just great on me! (in the living room) Yeah! Whoa! (grunts while flipping over the couch and stands on a table, sings) I'm trying to find a words to describe myself without being in disrespect (vocalizing) FOR!!!! Dang, Fred...
Fred's Mom: (offscreen) Fred, please stop singing!
Fred: (stops singing) Sorry, Mom! (chuckles, gets down from the table)
(scene cuts to Fred behind his piano)
Fred's Mom: (offscreen) Right when I thought there was gonna be some peace and quiet, you start screaming at the top of your lungs, Fred. Stop!
Fred: Oh my gosh, Mom, talk to the hand because the face is not gonna put up with that, okay? Hi guys, um, I'm sorry with to put up with that nonsense, but I don't even know why my mom was being mad because I'm just practicing for the dance tonight! (really excited) Yes! You heard that, right? My school is having their annual Valentine's Day dance TONIGHT!!! I am so ready for this dance. I even wore my best khaki pants.
(screen cuts to Fred's khakis for the dance)
Fred: (offscreen) Yep, you see it right. These are my khakis and my ankles might be shown, but that is just fine with me.
(screen cuts to Fred)
Fred: I'm especially excited for the dance because I am gonna hard core fast dance with Judy. (practices dance like crazy) I'm gonna be dancing like this the whole entire night. (singing) Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh! Oh! Break down to the move! Break down to the move! OOOOHHHHHH!!!!! Get down to the beat! Get down to the beat! Get d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d... down to the... (he suddenly bumps and slips onto the Guitar Hero set, stops singing) My bad! (laughs nervously, sadly) Let's just hope that doesn't happen at the dance! (softly, in the bathroom, brushes his hair) The most fantastic whole thing about this whole dance thing is that Kevin... he's fat and all, um, he won't be able to dance very long 'cause his body will get all sweaty and his armpits will have stains and... no one wants to dance with the fat sweaty guy. Trust me. I think I know my mom tells me about it. I mean, I'm not trying to offend any of you guys, but my mom just informed me that... girls aren't attracted to the sweaty boys and... I'm sorry. If you're sweaty, maybe the doctor can give you medicine for it. I can't help you with that, I'm sorry! (sighs, holds up an axe body spray on his hand) Now that my hair is that I'm gonna spray some delicious body spray on me that is gonna track those girls in flocks. They're gonna be coming up to me in groups. Everyone's gonna want to dance with the Fred master.
(screen cuts to Fred behind the front door)
Fred: Okay. Well, Mr. Figglehorn is gonna hit the dance floor, so I'll talk to you guys later. (walks out the door and turns around to the door knob on the other side to close it)
(screen fades in black)
(screen fades back to the front door)
(4 hours and 34.6 minutes later...)
Fred: (runs back home, screaming sadly) I'm never going back to that school ever again!
(screen cuts to Fred's khakis that was peed on)
Fred: (offscreen) Eww! They made me so mad that I peed my pants and ruin my best khakis!
(screen cuts to Fred behind the khakis he took off and shows everyone the regular pants that he putted on and one of the neighborhood squirrels is running up to the peed on khakis and starts to chew on it)
Fred: (still sadly) I had to change back into my regular pants 'cause my other pants smells like urine! (turns around and notices that the neighborhood squirrel is chewing on Fred's peed on khakis) NO!!! (holds up the squirrel) No chewing on pants that I peed on, okay? (cuddles it) It's okay. I know you did know better! (after he puts down the squirrel, sadly again) But anyways, um, the dance didn't go as I planned... (laughs nervously) ...because Judy was dancing with that fat slob the whole entire time and he was sweaty! And she was still dancing with him! I'm not even extraditing, the dancing was sick! It was so disgusting and I honestly wouldn't even be surprised if Judy was pregnant after dancing with him like that. Judy was dancing like she was in a 50 cent video or something. I mean, it was like she was in a hard core rap video. (softly) Well, um, I guess I can't just focus on all the negative things because I mean, even though I was dancing by myself in the corner most of the time, I did dance with 1 person. Okay. So I was just in the corner dancing my myself when this girl with a bunch of acne covering her face came up to me and asked me if I wanted to dance! I mean, once I got passed the fact that her face was covered in acne, I mean, it was pretty fun. We danced the "Single Ladies" by Beyoncé, we both knew the dance perfectly, so... it worked out well! (angrily) I mean, all the other kids were laughing at us and taking pictures on their phones... but I didn't care! If I had a chance, I would teach each and everyone of the kids in my school a lesson or 2! Then maybe they'd accept me. (sadly) I mean, seriously! The kids in my school should be happy I'm there! I bring a lot to the table. (softly) I know the "Single Ladies" dance, I'm a good singer, and sometimes I bring strange animals to school. So they should be happy. Okay. Well, the dance was okay I guess, I mean, it wouldn't been better if Judy would've noticed me, but...
Fred: I gotta go! Okay, talk to you guys later. I hope you guys all have a good Valentine's Day.
(screen cuts a little bit to the ending frame in "Fred Goes On A Date With Judy")
((c) Fee Entertainment)
- Fred Figglehorn
- Fred's Mom (voice only)
- Neighborhood Squirrel #1